Overcoming Adverse Childhood Experiences and Childhood Abuse
Working comfortably, offering gentle lasting change
I offer specialist approaches which aim to provide thorough and comfortable experience for clients who are seeking resolution to problems - rather than just 'coping' with them.
Wanting to assist people further who have experienced adverse childhood experiences (including childhood abuse), I added specialist training and certification by undertaking Trauma and Abuse Specialist Skills Training in 2012, and have also trained in other specialised approaches for addressing various problems and issues resulting from childhood abuse, and/or poor parenting experiences.
The aim of working this way is to give opportunity to move beyond just 'coping' or 'managing' and, offer lasting change - whether or not your current challenges are a result of adverse childhood experiences/ childhood abuse / childhood trauma or adulthood trauma/ experiences of inadequate/inappropriate parenting.
Why are these approaches so unique?
- Designed to provide comfort and maintain dignity.
- Do not require you to talk about/relive past experiences, (i.e. trauma or childhood abuse) in order to be effective.
- Provide a flexible, and measurable structure, to ensure you are achieving and sustaining your desired changes/goals.
- Aim to provide lasting change, to resolve many issues, regardless of whether the adverse childhood experiences are classed as childhood abuse / traumatic experiences, or not.
- People experiencing these approaches often report they are enjoyable to work with and are pleased to have found an approach which offers opportunity to work through even highly traumatic experiences in a dignified and more comfortable way
I deal with many areas which can be linked to adverse childhood experiences, childhood abuse and poor-parenting experiences - these can include:-
- Low Self Confidence
- Low Self Esteem
- Strong feelings of inadequacy
- Trust issues
- Relationship difficulties
- Sexual Dysfunction
- Panic Attacks
- Sleep disturbances
- Challenges with Food, Drugs or Alcohol
- Inability to touch, or be touched
- High-Low Risk Taking
- Skin problems
- Irritable Bowel Syndrome
- General aches and pains
- Psychosomatic Pain
- Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)
- Panic Attacks
- + Many other challenges
Disclaimer - If you have been diagnosed or suspect you may have such medical condition, you should consult your GP for advice, diagnosis and treatment and always inform your health professional before starting any alternative or additional therapies or treatments.
Limiting to Limitless Beliefs
Many emotional issues and unwanted behaviours are underpinned by limiting belief statements. These are beliefs about self, others and the world around us that can often be formed through messages received during early childhood years and/or if experiencing poor parenting or childhood abuse for example. They may seem like a truth rather than simply a belief. Examples of limiting beliefs include, “I’m not/never good enough”, “The world is not a safe place”, "nobody likes me" etc. The belief statements that we hold can have a profound influence on our behaviour, choices, self-esteem and self-confidence.
For some people messages heard in younger years can be very apparent to them and limiting/limiting beliefs that they hold may well be very obvious.
For others, limiting beliefs are still controlling their whole experience, however, they may not be aware of these, as the beliefs are not visible, and lie in the background and may well be evident through problems, behaviours, reactions and/or are often experienced through unpleasant/uncomfortable feelings.
An example of the impact of limiting beliefs:- Someone might be aware that singing is not one of their strong points, however, to use the phrase in response to that challenge by saying ‘oh, I’m terrible, I’m not good enough’ is a mistake – speaking as if being not good enough is an ‘absolute truth’ about their self/identity.
People can be puzzled as to why they hold limiting beliefs when they have never knowingly experienced trauma, nor childhood abuse etc :-
As humans we need to make meaning of our experiences, and if there is absence of information we make what meaning we can – for example, in the absence of appropriate praise and encouragement, a young child without any other information, may go onto conclude, and then believe, that they are ‘never good enough’ and carry that feeling/belief unconsciously into their adult lives.
Unfortunately, many other factors such as absence of praise for a child (which may be unintentional) can lead to the formation of invisible limiting beliefs.
Furthermore, if a child simply witnesses a parent, caregiver or significant adult, demonstrate ineffective behaviour themselves, such as poor coping skills, poor life management, or perhaps unfortunately has mental/emotional health challenges, this may also inadvertently impact on the child unconsciously, even though not specifically directed towards the child.
Addressing these underlying belief statements allows us to discover new, enriching and life-affirming belief statements. This can be part of providing a firm foundation for new helpful/supportive behaviours and support desired outcomes from your sessions.
Call Jason to book a free no-obligation enquiry call – Tel. 07739 466318
Working only with the ‘Conscious Mind’
Many other approaches can largely focus upon the conscious mind – through talking and listening. However, often simply talking about a problem, or events from the past (negative childhood experiences/bullying/neglect/childhood abuse) might only bring temporary relief. Some people increase their understanding of the problem - yet the actual problem remains. Others find talking does not help at all, or as can be the case with painful experiences of trauma and negative childhood experiences, may feel worse, or even re-traumatised.
Although no one is disputing the value and importance of talking and listening, this different approach, recognises talking and listening alone rarely resolves problems resulting from adverse childhood experiences or, childhood abuse.
Working only with the ‘Unconscious Mind’
Conversely, working with Hypnosis alone might focus largely upon the ‘subconscious’ mind.
Undoubtedly, this is where feelings and beliefs are stored, and it is vital that connection with the subconscious is made for change to occur. However, often change will not stick, or will be ‘unpicked’. The conscious mind does not have opportunity to make sense of the change through having it’s vital ‘why’ and ‘how’ questions answered.
Working with the whole person
People often attempt to solve their problems in a logical/conscious way which can work for some of our ‘today’ problems. However, they frequently become frustrated as they know the problem, what needs to happen, but find that another part of them is unable to achieve or sustain the desired results. Perhaps thinking to themselves, or saying to others, ‘I realise I shouldn’t feel/think this way, but I just do!’ And unfortunately, this may also be accompanied with frustration, and/or feelings of failure.
As adults, we try to reason logically, without connecting to the part of us where beliefs, feelings and behaviours are stored. It is like there is another part which cannot hear us, and is located in another place entirely.
By working with the whole person the vital connection between conscious and subconscious is utilised to give opportunity for lasting change to occur.
When conscious and subconscious are connected and working together, vital information can be shared between the two. This can allows us to transform our problems/feelings, clear up outdated limiting beliefs, and take on more life enhancing behaviours and attitudes.
One way this vital connection can be maintained is by using imagery-based approaches to connect the today adult/conscious part of the person with "younger" parts (or aspects) of themselves located within the subconscious seeking to correct the impact from past experiences.
Thorough, Rapid, Gentle and Dignified
Because communication between the conscious and subconscious is carefully worded to address the whole person, a thorough approach can be offered. Furthermore, problem feelings, behaviours and client goals are rated and measured periodically to assist both practitioner and client in highlighting areas should they still need attention.
You are not required to talk in detail about problems or experiences. Some people prefer to talk through issues in more detail, and some not. You can relax in the knowledge and freedom of knowing giving extensive detail is not required. Working this way maintains our safety and dignity – making it ideal for those who have experienced painful events such as trauma, childhood abuse, poor parenting etc.
Also, no ‘reliving’ of past experiences is required, and therefore a gentle approach is offered – even for extreme trauma.
How long does an appointment last?
Appointments are usually 90 minutes, or 2 hours in length and may be weekly, fortnightly, or up to monthly, depending on the pace at which you wish to progress. A complementary 30-minute confidential initial enquiry call offers opportunity for discussing this further.